01 Job Hunting

[belfire]

Who: Fabulous Demon Overlord Kazuya and YOU
Where: Virgo ward
Summary: Kazuya looking for a job - well, trying to, anyway.
Warnings: Demon Overlords do not do jobs.

Kazuya had come to an unfortunate truth.

He needed a job.

He couldn't go back to his own world with his Bel powers on the fritz, so until he discovered a way to get them working again, or a portal home of some sort, he would have to get comfortable for the amount of time he would stay here. Which meant he would need to get an income, i.e a job.

It was a bit weird to think about, really, since he had thought that doing something as mundane as working was beyond him now. His days were to be filled with the war against God, not doing human work things. Could he even consider himself human anymore? Probably not. He found it hard to think in human terms at times and even his ability to empathise was starting to erode away.

But that was depressing to think about. Let's go back to the lesser evil: working.

Kazuya thought that it would be best to go through the Virgo ward, since it was the shopping ward, but nothing really enticed him. He couldn't see himself working retail - he doubted he could keep his temper if he had to deal with difficult customers - but there wasn't much else. Maybe he could do warehouse work...

Urrrrgh...

So here, have a frustrated looking Demon Overlord mooching about the shops. Got job offers? Brilliant! If you want to simply bug him? Even better!

Comments

[belfire]

Kazuya suddenly smirked, dropping his hand from his neck. "This is starting to sound like something out of a geeky romance film."

[otakuro]

"No way. Who wants to see a romance film about a nerd working on a computer all day?" Densha Otoko at least involved train rides.

[belfire]

"You'll be surprised. Maybe there's some nerd girl wanting to see a romance between a nerd boy and his ultra cool Demon King bestie," Kazuya hummed, barely suppressing his amused laughter.

[otakuro]

Atsuro raises an unamused eyebrow.

"Seriously, though, if anyone's starring in a movie, it's gonna be you and Yoohoo. I guess that leaves me with Midori -- no, wait she's with Keisuke, right?

"So Miss Mari and Kaido, Gin and Haru, I wouldn't have any chance with Amane..... Aw geez, I'm stuck with, like, Black Frost."

Not jealous at all.

[belfire]

"Black Frost is awesome though," Kazuya mock-pouted. He really was. The coolest, cutest, most useful demon to ever exist he sweared. "How about we switch? You get Yuzu and I get Black Frost. That seems fair to me."

[otakuro]

So awesome that Atsuro somehow had knowledge of him even though he didn't show up on his route. Kazuya's response keeps him from dwelling on it too much, though.

"Hah, that's a deal!" ...Did he sound too eager? "I mean, only for you, you know? I don't want her to hurt you too bad. She hits hard."

[belfire]

"Mmhmm..." Yeah, Kazuya wasn't buying it. "Sure. You're a true bro, taking the fall like that."

[otakuro]

"Yeah, that's me." Atsuro shrugs slightly as he prepares to make an uncomfortably meta reference. "Brotsuro, that's what they call me behind my back at school."

...

"Apart from Yuzu, anyway."

[belfire]

"Really? Never heard of that one," Kazuya said, feigning a thoughtful tone. "Brotsuro...Brotsuro...heh, I kinda like the sound of that actually. That's your name from now on."

[otakuro]

Luckily, no one was around to mention how much more prosodicly 'Atsubro' rolled off the tongue. He chuckles slightly to himself.

"Just as long as you're cool with Kazunya. We discussed it behind your back and decided to change it on all the attendance rosters."

[belfire]

"Sur- what?! That was you?!"

Kazuya had suffered multiple teachers - usually the substitutes - calling him Kazunya for years! He had thought that all of them were being sassy assholes for no reason but-

Damn, Atsubro. That prank was good.

[otakuro]

"U-Uh. Wait, I thought..."

Actually he had just brought it up as a joke but apparently one of their mutual friends had taken it seriously.

"Ahahahah... Gee, it must've been hard to find a kanji with 'nya' in it."

That's all Atsuro has to say on the topic next subject next subject....... crap quick think of a next subject.

[belfire]

Kazuya looked suitably unimpressed, his eyebrow twitching slightly in irritation. "I was called Kazunya for years..." he muttered, sounding almost sulky over it.

He suddenly shoved a hand into Atsuro's face and turned his face away. "I'm going to shun you for the rest of the day now."

[otakuro]

"Huh? W-Wait! It's... a term of affection! It'll make you more attractive to the girls! Girls love kittens, right?"

[belfire]

"Kittens are cute," Kazuya sniffed, and he almost seemed to fluff up like a very disgruntled kitten himself, his eyes narrowed slightly. "Demon Kings aren't cute."

[otakuro]

"But you're such a cute Demon King..."

Atsuro wonders if patting Kazunya on the head will leave him minus a hand for the rest of his life.

[belfire]

Most likely - Kazunya looked ready to bite whatever appendage came close to his head.

"I am super intimidating," Kazuya harrumphed. "Nothing about me is cute- I have a cape!"

[otakuro]

"Uh... Yeah."

Like a kid who thinks dressing up like Superman makes him the baddest dude around. Atsuro refrains from speaking this particular thought aloud, given that he was rather fond of all of his appendages.

"And the headphones?"

[belfire]

Kazuya narrowed his eyes suspiciously at Atsuro, and raised his hands to protectively settle them over the headphones. "Naoya gave them to me," he said defensively.

[otakuro]

"What about the ones I gave you for your birthday last year?"

They were made of paper. Also scribbled on in crayon to resemble cat ears even more. Also made in 5 minutes during a particularly boring cram session on integrals. Also he had given him a real birthday present later.

[belfire]

Kazuya's defensive expression immediately went flat.

"Oh. Those. Yeah, they're, uh, on a very special pedestal. Too important to wear. Collector's item."

[otakuro]

"They're one-of-a-kind, that's for sure!" Atsuro cheerfully continues. "If you're ever replaced by a clone, it'll be our special secret to make sure that you're the real deal."

A suspenseful pause.

"Except that I never made you headphones! Fake!"

This was just getting silly now. And he totally did.

[belfire]

"Mwahahaha!"

Kazuya didn't care if it was stupid. He hadn't been stupid or silly in a long time - being King of Bel required some sort of dignity - and being silly with Atsuro was always hilarious. So he gripped the side of his cape, holding it up in a style similar to a cliché vampire.

"You found me out, Hero!"

And out rolls out the cliché RPG dialogue too.

[otakuro]

"Who are you and what did you do with the real Kazunya?!" Atsuro assumes the stereotypical martial arts stance, including the bouncing-back-and-forth idle animation. "It's past his bedtime and I haven't even fed him his kitty chow yet!"

Maybe not cliche, but terrible dialogue, anyway.

[belfire]

"You will never know! Not unless you defeat me...and that is impossible!"

Terribad dialogue of the nth degree.

Kazuya swept his cape behind him dramatically, crossing his arms and pointing his nose up into the air like any good Video Game Villain. He grinned evilly, his eyes twinkling with amusement, before shifting into a martial arts stance as well, copying with the bouncing-back-and-forth animation.

"Your journey ends here~"